A beautiful song should be sung!!

Pa-papa-papaaaaaahhh, da-dada-da-dummm.........

Melody is likely to have its most meaning when one is in love. So when is it that you know you are in love? Is it that constant yearning to stay close to that person - 247 on a phone, constant meets and so on. But, whats more incredible is the fact that there those tons of moments in time when apart from each other physically that you actually miss each other.
Sometimes the universe even gets you wanting each other at the same time. Life is a funny thing, it lives to fill into us moments in time but, bliss & happiness can only be felt during those tumultuous moments that fill you with satisfaction - that moment when together with each other, that moment your hands touch, your fingers lock, that hug, that light peck - moments in time that are so strong that they will elevate you into a feeling of embrace that cannot be anything more that love. Tears of joy, tears of pain, tears that life has to offer can be drive in from every single moment that we live in love.
To be lucky is to be in love, there is no 'lucky in love' its just lucky to have every fallen in love. There are days in our lives when the emptiness is all you can feel waiting, hoping & praying for that special someone to come into your live and fill that void - if only for a moment.
I cherish every moment I have, every moment in love is moment to feel like in heaven and for that I thank God - I will never know how far it may last, I will never know how much I will be tested but, I do know that every single moment in love I'm thankful for and every single moment in love makes me want to live a life in pure joy.
One thing I do however know is that I'm not worthy to have such love in my life - to belong, to be wanted, to support, to share, to be together even if not forever. The song that crosses my mind is 'The Rhythm of Love' by the Plain White T's. Take a listen if you ever have even one of these moments pass you by you'll know that what you feel is something to hold onto.

My head is stuck in the clouds,
she begs me to come down Says, "Boy, quit foolin' around"
I told her, "I love the view from up here,
warm sun and wind in my ear
We'll watch the world from above as it turns to the rhythm of love"

We may only have tonight
But 'til the morning sun, you're mine, all mine
Play the music low
And sway to the rhythm of love

Well, my heart beats like a drum,
guitar string to the strum
A beautiful song to be sung
She's got blue eyes,

deep like the sea that roll back when she's laughin' at me
She rises up like the tide the moment her lips meet mine

We may only have tonight
But 'til the morning sun, you're mine, all mine
Play the music low And sway to the rhythm of love

When the moon is low
We can dance in slow motion
And all your tears will subside
All your tears will dry

And long after I've gone, you'll still be humming along
And I will keep you in my mind, the way to make love so fine

We may only have tonight
But 'til the morning sun, you're mine, all mine
Play the music low And sway to the rhythm of love
Play the music low And sway to the music of love Yeah,
sway to the music of love

Can I Dance With You?

Time passes quite fast and we all believe thate we're growing, even if its just that inch wider. The growth is the fact that we believe in the hope that we're driving towards some point of success in the wild imagination we constantly convince ourselves to hold onto. Well, holding on is one thing, then theres actually acting on it. So would I rate success through that materialistic never-ending yearning to gather the most number of marbles working towards an eventual goal that will give you the power and pleasure that only envy can thrive on? ummm yea-ha that seems to work with most people right? So when I choose someone in my life that does not want to compare against that - what next? Hold on to some hope that there is more to life than just materialistic pleasures? Naaaaaa thats impossible, must be some spiritual mumbo-jumbo driving that feeling moreso.. just a fantasy killer.

I wish I had more, I really wish I did but then again thats exactly what the next fellas putting up and praying for. So whats the reality, or do we want to even ask that question?

In this search for the perfect partner everyone starts to look for the sanest choice rather than the perfect collaboration of a million pieces put together. Thats when reality kicks in... making plans for tomorrow has never been fun especially when it means growing up and out of oblivion. Wish I could sit back and yearn for nothing. After all, like the saying goes - "So little so much to do", i'd rather spend my days with someone who does not need to make plans for tomorrow. But we are deep-down looking for that piece of stability, sanity and of course someone else to lean on..... and of course all the way to the end of the world. "You & me together, could do anything forever" and all the sanity that attaches itself to that parody of love forever.

Give me a few moments to think of a perfect moment and i'll walk you through a journey - sitting at the edge of the world in a beach-chair, looking at the wonder of the sea with waves lapping at your feet. Some spanish / irish (yes IRISH) melody to add to the flavour of the sweet smelling water and you are living in bliss. A bit of dancing at night to follow but then thats another picture. Crawl through a cranky friction, the most senile you could find and that makes for a moment made in heaven. Take a vacation to experience and you'll begin to believe in God. There is no way that you could've ever expected to see any of this without someone, somewhere, somehow putting this perfect concocction together - the only answer will, of course remain, God.

So what am I tallking about today? I dont really know. Should I quote 'The Script' with their unending whine about how breaking up aint fair and that the best part of me was always you? Umm maybe or maybe not. How'd you get on with your life and i'm still holding my hands open waiting for you to come back? What would I do? What would i do without you? Live it up - work my butt off? i'm still alove but barely breathing. I hardly pray to my God but I do believe in him. I'm guessing that you've met a man who's willing to put you first in his life. When a heart breaks if fucking well dont break-even.

I know that there is hope, and well of course love, to my name. I know that there is hope - God did it with my career and He will do it with the rest of my life. So what should I do to get things straight and right? Hopefully i'll live long enough to know that this is the first step to searching for something else. If there only was someone I could wait for - with the hope that you'd come back to me?? but thats not the hope i'm wating on...i'm past that point and looking for the better part of life. Maybe someday you'll wake up and find your heart missing me and if you ever turn around and search for me - I will be waiting, just not for you.

One thing that remains forever is that I did want to spend my life with a girl like you, and do all the things that you wanted me to, its unfortunate that time has come to pass that I no longer want to ask - Can I dance with you?

Reminiscence

And then there are those moments in life when that moment recreates itself in a sense of possibility. The life that was, the life that would've been, the hope that left you behind........
I spent time dwelling on the past and then worked up the courage to move on. Heft in order, pride shattered, that sense to emote left scared, working through that tussle of regret and anger & left staring at a closed door to the future. If only it was another man I'd feel redeemed with proven inability. Unfortunately all that there is to hold on is the hope in regret. Pathetic as this sounds remnants of a past that didn't walk away, didn't hide away but, still lingers.
It still lingers like the crackle of a soft tone when in pain, the connection through bouts of concern, twisting strands behind that gorgeous milky-white toned ear, the soft grip of interlocking fingers, that shoulder brush in turning away, the feel of that cheek rubbing against a rugged palm, the sweet smell of a naked body on clean sheets and of course a passion aroused with every split-second kiss that keeps the daze alive long enough to forget any other feeling through a human body.
If only I'd realise what kind of a person I am - not in conjunction with that higher being - I'd shy away and hide from the fact that growing into a better person was not because I put any effort into it but solely dependant on being built to what I am today, hopefully, what I will be tomorrow!!
Joshua Radin from the 'Scrubs' fame put out a gorgeous number called 'Winter'. Gives you that warm feeling of that person you lost giving hope only in the lingering feelings of yesteryear. Do not just read through the lyrics but hit you-tube / hit the closest music store and pick this one up - its worth a listen.

I should know who I am by now

I walk the record stands somehow

Thinking of winter

Your name is the splinter inside me

While I wait

And I remember the sound

Of your November downtown

And I remember the truth

A warm December with you

But I don't have to make this mistake

And I don't have to stay this way

If only I would wait ('wake?)

The walk has all been cleared by now

Your voice is all I hear somehow

Calling out winter

Your voice is the splinter inside me

While I wait

And I remember the sound

Of your November downtown

And I remember the truth

A warm December with you

But I don't have to make this mistake

And I don't have to stay this way

If only I would wait ('wake?)

I could have lost myself in rough blue waters in your eyes

And I miss you still

I remember the sound

Of your November downtown

And I remember the truth

A warm December with you

But I don't have to make this mistake

And I don't have to stay this way

If only I would wait ('wake?)

Going back to the start

This piece was in Draft for about 2 years and for some moment of perfection that is today, I happened to be reading through some of my Blog's and stumbled across this one just when the very song that I was writing for began to play on the Radio. Coincidences apart, it seems a worthy moment for me to finish and publish this song.

Many times in our lives we spend all our days searching for a meaning. A meaning for something special, something special that sets you apart, something to give you purpose to your life, to your existence on earth and at times just simply - seeking a profound meaning of life's little treasures that are short-lived in reality but remain perennial in your mind keeping you plugged into a constant exploration questioning what if, how, why and why not.....dwelling in what can only be measured as a fraction of a second in reality but a life long journey in your mind - its called a moment. Sometimes meaning can give you angst, hunger for hope and and deprive you of a treasure that is clouded in you just yearning to learn of its meaning.
Meaning, meaning, meaning - the meaning of life, the meaning of love, whats would we do if we didn't step towards that search for the everlasting stairway yearning for the meaning for everything? If you were to fall in love - a supposition that will already take you back to the memory of that past love that you gave up on or passed you by and you wonder and wonder - What if? Then on reflection provide yourself with a choice to dwell on what could have been or decide with the easiest of lies that you have reprogrammed yourself to believe that it was never meant to be and with that wipe that phase away for the moment like swiftly administered amnesia thinking that life must move on.
If only I could go back, If only she actually believed in me, if only I could change myself just a little bit - its such a shame that we had to part. Wish I could be there to look at myself when it all began - right at the start and I'll bet you'll have a smile on your face.

The band Coldplay most times, get emotions, bang-on-spot and leave no stone unturned when it comes to giving you the hope of facing the future of life's little adventures in anticipation of avoiding any (supposed) misery and hoping for a change. Well here is a song pleading for a bit of hope. The Scientist by Coldplay.

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry

You don't know how lovely you are.

I had to find you, tell you I need you,

Tell you I set you apart.

Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions,

Oh lets go back to the start.

Running in circles,

Comin' up TailsHeads on a science apart.

Nobody said it was easy,It's such a shame for us to part.

Nobody said it was easy, No one ever said it would be this hard.

Oh take me back to the start.

I was just guessin' at numbers and figures,

Pulling your puzzles apart.

Questions of science, science and progress

Do not speak as loud as my heart.

And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me

Oh and I rush to the start.

Runnin' in circles, Chasin' up TailsComin' back as we are

Nobody said it was easy,Oh it's such a shame for us to part.

Nobody said it was easy,No one ever said it would be so hard.

I'm goin' back to the start.

Don't know why you're so far away!!!

Its so much easier to relate to life, compare it with emotional turmoil, throw in a spoonful of hope or desire and you've got yourself a concoction, wild at the least, of spirited reality, exercising a strange sense of what was once the memory of love.

Then one day it surfaces, goes back into hiding and then re-surfaces like a passion driven emotion. But then again that is what Love is. Then whats with this bloody 'forbidden love'. Marraiges are made in heaven until someone finds love outside, relationships are full of ups and downs but then again so is life, so whats special apart from the prospect of holding onto companionship? Well its just that!!!

So what would you do if you meet 'the one'? Well you should definately hold onto that person and hope that you get a positive response, right? So what if you still find that you have a response, its positive, and unfortunately nothing to build on because she's in a committed relationship? Well if ur not the hyper-go-getter types you cannot hound the person to get after you - all you can do is stand back, respect the fact that you have a friend, Thank God that you have not lost hope in life, think about the possibility of geting a u-turn on that impossibility & put in a heartfelt number on having everything a finger's length away yet nover gonna get within your grasp.

This is Daniel Bedingfield's - If you're not the One...............

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?

If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?

If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?

If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?

I never know what the future brings

But I know you are here with me now

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?

If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?

If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?

If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know why you're so far away

But I know that this **much** is true

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

And I wish that you could be the one I die with

And I'm praying you're the one I build my home with

I hope I love you all my life

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away

And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today

'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right

And though I can't be with you tonight

You know my heart is by your side

I don’t wanna run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand

If I’m not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

Sayo

In memory of a friend I lost a few years ago.

Today Sayo, we'd be drinking in celebration. Happy Birthday!!
Holding a candle in my window - all for you!!

Put a candle in the window, but I feel I've got to move.

Though I'm going, going, I'll be coming home soon,

'Long as I can see the light.

Pack my bag and let's get movin', 'cause I'm bound to drift a while.

Well I'm gone, gone, you don't have to worry no,

'Long as I can see the light.

Guess I've got that old trav'lin' bone, 'cause this feelin' won't leave me alone.

But I won't, won't be losin' my way, no, no

'Long as I can see the light.

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Oh, Yeah!

Put a candle in the window, 'cause I feel I've got to move.

Though I'm going, going, I'll be coming home soon,

Long as I can see the light.

Long as I can see the light.

Long as I can see the light.

Long as I can see the light.

Appriciation

Every time I get an opportunity to sit down and write on this blog I'm motivated to do so only because of a feverish emotion running through me. An emotion? well yes! An emotion. An emotion is, in my books, the only inkling in anyones body that can ensure that you are driven to get to vent out, express, challenge, discover, yearn and basically hope that you would act on that. Emotions arisen out of the blue? Well, not really. Emotions take you on a ride all through the various anecdotes of life - irrespective of the fact that they help you react in a positive and/or negative way but then again, a reaction can be termed to be positive or negative only by the perception that one is able to derive from the reaction, but, lets not take a trip down that road and get back to the motivation that we call emotion. I derive my emotional motivation by any significant moment in my life or a strong sense of hope or disaster that I can feel from a strong lyricized song at a desperate moment. Desperate!! well every one of us are desperate at every moment in life. Examples you say? well here are some:
- Does she like me?
- Man! The moon is full tonight?
- I love you!
- Ouch! my heart.
- Hmmm that was cute.
Not desperation you say? Well these are all just examples where every one of us are searching for an answer, a solution to contemplation, pain, love, joy, satisfaction - all modes of desperation to feel.
Apart form desperation and hope you have that unending roller coaster called 'LOVE'. ouch what a blinding effect it can have on people I must say right? Well it does. Love make you feel complete. It make you feel wanted, special, hopeful, gives you the motivation to feel for someone else more that you you could aspire to do yourself, and if you don't feel this well - then you're not in love!! Ever suddenly stop In your tracks when you hear a wonderful song that fits into that relationship you are / were on? Ever go shopping for a pair of pants by yourself and return with tons of things for the one you love simply because you have to, just have to see the smile on his/her face when you give them the things you picked up? Ever see a message or hear uttered to you those infamous 3 words by the one you love when, in the middle of a chaotic moment leaving you feeling lost in the passion of life, love and suddenly you cannot help but smile? A moment lost, is a moment lost forever and therefore you'd give up that drive in a cushy air-conditioned car only to walk through hail storming rain or sweltering heat just to hold hands and be with someone who'll make you skip a beat of your heart.
There are millions of people out there who today - feel love. They feel the love just like you and me, deep down in their heart. They love the fact that they cannot express this feeling in words and can only feel the ache of wanting to be with someone. And yes it does feel out-of-this-world amazing. Then there are those who have not felt love but can romanticize the feeling of love and can definitely want to reach out for that romantic event and hold on with dear life until the end of time. And finally, there are those who have loved, with every ounce of their heart & soul but, lost it. This last bunch of losers, not to put things harshly, are the ones who are on an absolute roller-coaster of life. It hurts, believe you me, it really does hurt when relationships break up. Its one thing to feel it first hand but, another to see someone else go through a breakup and all you can do is ask them to hold on and hope that things come together and no-one wakes up one day and says they want to leave, its a simple cumilative effect of deteriorating love. Commitment is all that is there and commitment is all that one can hope hold the relationship together where the glue can only be love.
Without Love, you have no hope, no meaning to a relationship, no heart to hold onto, no meaning to the existence of an emotional motivation to hold on to each other. Without love you and I have no meaning to life, no meaning to hope, no meaning to want, no meaning to feel - feel passion. You want to say the words - you're like a dream to me, you're the only one for me, you're all my heart can ache for, and the killer cliche - You complete me!!
But that apart - riding through a broken heart is a terrible disaster for a guy. Most guys feel the pain but cannot explain how a strong masculine exo-structure can hold a weeping little boy who didn't get picked to play in the game - so they bottle things inside them, pick up a beautiful bottle of the cheapest yet choicest alcohol & a pack of cigarettes and try to drive that feeling away. Can feeling numb take away the pain of a woman leaving you? Well for sometime Yes, it does work but, for the long haul not really!! The pain comes back and joins the huge bulge which helped grow on you through the pity liquor, cigarettes and that crappy grub you've been dishing in. The faster you wake up the better.
If you've been with someone who's woken up and walked out on what you thought was a strong relationship and confusion has just set in? Stand back! Stop asking why! Hold out on Hope and remember you've lost a woman you didn't appreciate enough before she left else she'd be by your side. Remorse? Hmmm a bit late in the game? well not really you have hope - there is tomorrow and then again you can sing through love lost. just like this great song I have here. Its a classy 'one-hit wonder' from an all-male, all-black group called '4:PM'. The song is called 'Sukiyaki' and will make you feel, every which way, through every single lyric. Take a read, better still run over to youtube or singingfool and take a listen - heaven in melody.

It's all because of you, I'm feeling sad and blue

You went away, now my life is just a rainy day

And I love you so, how much you'll never know

You've gone away and left me lonely

Untouchable memories, seem to keep haunting me

Another love so true

That once turned all my gray skies blue

But you disappeared

Now my eyes are filled with tears

And I'm wishing you were here with me

Soft with love are my thoughts of you

Now that you're gone

I just don't know what to do

(Chorus)

If only you were here

You'd wash away my tears

The sun would shine once again

You'd be mine all mine

But in reality, you and I will never be

'Cause you took your love away from me

Girl, I don't know what I did

To make you leave me

But what I do know

Is that since you've been gone

There's such an emptiness inside

I'm wishing you'd come back to me

(repeat Chorus)

Oh, baby, you took your love away from me!!